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Author: wzambon 🐝 HONORARY
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Number: of 77805 
Subject: Clavicular
Date: 05/20/26 5:23 PM
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The last month has been something of a whirlwind for Clavicular (real name Braden Peters), the “looksmaxxing” influencer perhaps best known for doing a bunch of meth and smashing himself in the face with a hammer in pursuit of handsomeness. Because, sure, that’s a thing now.

On Friday, he had his day in court for the crime of shooting at a dead alligator with fellow livestreamer Andrew “TheCubanTarzan” Morales, whereupon he pleaded guilty to unlawfully discharging a firearm in public and was sentenced to 20 hours of community service that he will not be allowed to livestream, along with a firearms safety course. But the real punishment came when the internet decided that he had been “brutally mogged” by the judge who sentenced him.

In case you don’t know, “mogging” (derived from the acronym AMOG — Alpha Male of the Group) means, um, being near someone while being better looking or having more muscles than they do.

Naturally, there was a backlash from Clavicular’s fanbase who swiftly stepped up to insist that he was not, in fact, “justicemogged” and was still better looking than the judge … according to science.

In other news, it remains a complete and total mystery as to why Gen Z women don’t want to date Gen Z men.


This last point, that Gen Z women don’t want to Date Gen Z men, was anecdotally confirmed for me at dinner in Columbia MO. We came for the Mizzou graduation of my wife’s granddaughter who said she didn’t have any desire to date the men of her generation.

I replied “I’ve heard that sentiment from several women your age. What is the reason for that aversion?”

“They’re dumbasses,” she answered.

I didn’t think it was appropriate for me to ask her to unpack that statement.

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