Subject: Re: Second order effects - asset depletion loans
And I told them it was silly because of the rule of 55 and that we can touch 100% of my wife's 401(k) right now if we wanted to, for any purpose, and I don't even think that the big bank or its mortgage broker knew what this is. That will teach me to be an informed investor.

Good-ish problem to have. One thing that might work even though you don't want to, is to go ahead start making SEPP withdrawals. Withdrawals from retirement accounts can count as income for mortgage purposes as long as they are documented and likely to continue. Or so I've heard. I have no personal experience with this. However, it might not be a bad idea anyway because you can make Roth conversions.