Subject: Trump pardons Blagojevich
yesterday, Donny Convict granted a full pardon to former Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich. why? because fuck you, that’s why.

Blagojevich is famous for two things: having a name that looks like someone chucked a bowl of alphabet soup at the wall, and for being one of the most shamelessly corrupt shitwads ever to be found guilty of corruption.

here’s what Roddy Blag did: in 2008, he tried to sell the Senate seat that was open when Barack Obama vacated it to become president.

that’s some pretty outside-the-box thinking, right there. your average governor will simply appoint a Senator when seats become open — but that weak-ass honesty shit wasn’t how Blag rolled. he turned the Obama vacancy into a game of highest bidder gets to go to Washington! who wants in?

no, really. the FBI recorded him saying, “I mean, I’ve got this thing, and it’s fucking golden. and I’m just not giving it up for fucking nothing.”

quite the potty-mouth on Rod, eh? long story short, Blag was impeached, removed from office, and in 2011, found guilty and sentenced to 14 years behind bars.

was there a reason for Donny to pardon Blag? no. was he innocent of the charges against him? no. was his sentence unreasonably harsh? no. was he suffering in prison? fuck no. he wasn’t even in prison. Donny had already commuted Blag’s sentence in 2019.

Donny and Blaggy were cronies, that’s all you need to know. in 2010, Blag was a contestant on the Donny’s game show, Celebrity Apprentice. that’s why he’s getting special treatment. you don’t like it? you think that Donny should respect the rule of law? oh, you innocent babe in the woods. Donny doesn’t give a shit about any stupid rule of law. he’s replaced it with the rule of because fuck you, that’s why.

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Donny Convict isn’t that hard to figure out.

there’s nothing much going on upstairs. he’s a rudimentary lizard-brain stem hard-wired to a rancid anus-mouth. that’s the whole ball of wax. Donny’s motivated by the belief that he should have all the power, all the money and all the attention, all the time.

everything Donny does can be filtered through that maxim. the constant threats to invade sovereign nations? power. the non-stop grifting of his worshipers? money. the near-daily press conferences and interviews since his inauguration? the bottomless need for attention.

oh wait — there’s a fourth motivation at work. Donny also does things just to be a dick — just because he can, because who’s going to stop him?

Donny does what he does because fuck you, that’s why.